ANN COULTER HITS ONE OUT OF THE PARK - AGAIN!

Read Ann's column on the Vanity Fair piece about Sarah Palin and the egotism and stupidity of its author who is, according to Ann's column, a certifiable nutcase! Read it here. Be prepared to laugh. Nobody can drain the hot air out of the pomposity of the left like Ann Coulter!

TUESDAY SNICKER!

Obama's poll numbers are so bad, the NAACP has started calling him "the first Hawaiian President."
~~ Ron Hart, Daily Caller

FOR YOUR WEDNESDAY AMUSEMENT

"Athiests Don't Have No Songs" - Steve Martin and the Steep Canyon Band in a gentle spoof of atheism. It's midweek, it's hot outside and we need to laugh. We especially need to laugh, given the current occupant of the White House!

TODAY'S QUOTE, COURTESY OF PIANO GIRL!

"I take exception to those saying that Obama, Reid and Pelosi are spending like drunken sailors.

When I was a drunken sailor, I quit spending when I ran out of money."

Wiser words were never spoken!

THOSE WILY ISRAELIS!

Courtesy of The Piano Girl, the following:

Israeli Sense of Humor
at UN

An ingenious example of speech and politics occurred recently in the United Nations Assembly and made the world community smile.

A representative from Israel began: 'Before beginning my talk I want to tell you something about Moses.

When he struck the rock and it brought forth water, he thought, 'What a good opportunity to have a bath!'

He removed his clothes, put them aside on the rock and entered the water.

When he got out and wanted to dress, his clothes had vanished. A Palestinian had stolen them.'

The Palestinian representative jumped up furiously and shouted, 'What are you talking about? The Palestinians weren't there then.'

The Israeli representative smiled and said, 'And now that we have made that clear, I will begin my speech.

OVERHEARD ON A D.C. STREET CORNER

I had a very high stress day yesterday - too much work, not enough time - so I slipped out for a very rare indulgence: a cigarette break! And there, standing on the corner of 12th and Pennsylvania Avenue, an attorney from another law firm joined me in observing several beggars pass by, gazing at us hopefully!

Finally, he turned to me and said (I'm not kidding): "On my next vacation I'm going to Calcutta - get away from the beggars!"

HOW TO START YOUR DAY ON AN UPBEAT NOTE!

1. Open a new file in your computer.
2. Name it "Hillary Rodham Clinton"
3. Send it to the trash bin.
4. Empty the trash.
5. Your PC will ask you, "Do you really want to get rid of "Hillary Rodham Clinton?"
6. Firmly Click "Yes."
7. Feel better!

P.S Tomorrow do it with Nancy Pelosi or John Murtha or Harry Reid.

I felt so much better after I did it!

IN THE MIDST OF MIND-NUMBING TRAGEDY, SOMETIMES

WE NEED A MINDLESS SMILE!

Ergo, the following!

A distinguished young woman on a flight from Switzerland asked the priest beside her, "Father, may I ask a favor?"

"Of course. What may I do for you?"

"Well, I bought an expensive electronic hair remover that is well over the Customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through Customs for me? Under your robes perhaps?"

"I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you: I will not lie."

"With your honest face, Father, no one will question you."

When they got to Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her.

The official asked, "Father, do you have anything to declare?"

"From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare."

The official thought this answer strange, so asked, "And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?"

"I have a marvelous little instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused."

Roaring with laughter, the official said, "Go ahead, Father."

Next!

FRIDAY ENTERTAINMENT!

From my handsome and brilliant Cousin Stu in Ajijic, Mexico: "Given that there is now a Muslim in Congress, I’m surprised politicians and the media haven’t been forced to start referring to “pork barrel spending” by a different name. I’m sure they’ll get to that. “Humus bowl outlays” has a nice ring to it."

GREAT LINES FROM THE MOVIES

Last night, while awaiting the beginning of Showtime's new miniseries "The Tudors", I watched the 2003 version of The Lion in Winter starring Patrick Stewart as King Henry II and Glenn Close as Eleanor of Aquitaine. It is a pretty decent production, although it doesn't rise to the acting level of the original film which starred Peter O'Toole and the magnificent Katherine Helpburn. I don't know if this line was in the original film, but I was startled to hear this very witty line uttered by Glenn Close, as Eleanor:

"Of course he has a knife, he always has a knife, we all have knives! It's 1183 and we're barbarians!"

Happy Birthday Brainster!

I think I celebrated too much.

DOES ANYONE KNOW WHERE I CAN PURCHASE THIS MIRROR?

Razorbacks

As President Bush gets off the helicopter in front of the White House, he is carrying a baby pig under each arm.

The squared away Marine guard snaps to attention, salutes, and says: "Nice pigs, sir."

The President replies: "These are not pigs, these are authentic Razorback Hogs, from Arkansas . I got one for Senator Ted Kennedy, and I got one for Senator John Kerry."

The squared away Marine again snaps to attention, salutes, and says, "Nice trade, sir."


h/t the beautiful Jackie Temple